[.the end of 2010.]

oh my God... i can see there are many spiders right here... the big a.k.a the king of spiders is looking at me without any specific reason.

btw, the day after tomorrow I'll be going back to IPBA. still waiting for my result. I don't want to spoil my the-very-last-day... so let's enjoy!!!

_HAPPY NEW YEAR, 2011_ 

"Once you have been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things,  facts or goal about yourself. At the end,choose 5 people to be tagged and you have to tag the person who had tagged you. If I tag you, it's because I want to know more about you."

ALL ABOUT ME!!!

1. My full name is Jaazli Bin Haji Ahmad.

2. People keep calling me Bruno Mars which I do not know why...

3. I love 'green' damn much and of course I support 'Go Green' campaign.

4. I am still single in term of love relationship. (Do I've to mention?)

5. I am the youngest in family.

6. I am very sensitive person (very, very, very!!!), so people out there please treat me well!

7. I love calculating but never score for my Additional Mathematics (btw, I did score for my Account :p).

8. I was born on August 29, 1991.

9. I love writing!(I've my own novel).

10. I never thought to be a teacher before. My first ambition was Interior Designer but due to some circumstances, I've changed my mind and now I'M TEACHER-TO-BE!!!

11. I hate frog! It looks like.... (I do not know how to describe it but for sure I hate frog!.

12. Mr. Azham Vosovic is my crime partner.

13. I do not eat fish just because of their smell (I'm not racist okay!).

14. I love cakes. Especially cheese cake!

15. I am trying to get perfect-body as I am too skinny.

16. My favourite supper will be chocolate and milk.

17. It's hard to find people who can pronounce/spell my name correctly.

18. I like to change my hair style frequently (according to my mood).

19. I love holidays! (no class, no lecturer and no assignment!)

20. I want to go Bali (badly).

21.I love fashion as well. Credits to my Sifu, Kamal Khairi. He taught me a lot.

22. In 2018, I will be the next millionaire.

23. Music makes me crazy.

24. I hate flu!

25. And last but not least, some of the facts above are not true!!! Hahahaha.... (If you really want to know about me, see me personally!)

Thank you to Azham Vosovic for tagging me!!!

I do not have any specific people to tag... You are allow to tag yourself... Thank you for reading...

[.holiday.]

Okay, I will confess it all right here: my holiday has been polluted by my sister wedding preparation. I've been preparing so many things including those hantaran, card and etc... It seems like I am the one who will get married!!! and i am officially announcing that I will be her servant for the whole holidays until she 'really' get married with her so-called perfect-future-husband... So people, I am so sorry if I cant reply your messages or in any social networks.... btw, happy holiday to all enjoy your holiday to the fullest!!!

[.dexter!!!.]

[.love.]

I need more than that...

[.tell me something...!]

I pretend not to know what love is for everyone, but I can tell you what it is for me; love best defined as knowing all about someone, and still wanting to be with them no matter what, more than any other person, love is trusting them enough to tell them everything about yourself, including the things you might be ashamed of, and love is about a feeling of comfortable and safe with someone. If you prefer not to tell me, keep it as your 'biggest secret'... by all means... I'm more than okay... I don't care! :p

[.freedom at last?.]

I'm really really happy. MY EXAMS ARE FINISHED! Even though I'm not sure whether I did well or not on my LDS paper, I am just happy it is done and over with. Really hope I can start hanging out with my friends and so we can start watching all movies and etc...

EXAMS ARE FINALLY OVER! YAY-NESS!!!

[.you hurt me...]

Do you know that you hurt me? Do you even care?

I cared about you more than the  others...

I don't know where it went wrong.

BUT...

Let me ask you one thing before I let you go,
I want you to forgive me and remember it never really ends.
Because you'll always have a special place in my heart,
And you'll always be my friend.

Thank you for everything...

[.happy birthday mrs. emak!.]

It’s your birthday,Emak.
So I will raise a cheer.
Without you, my special, loving emak,
I would not be here.


Yes, I owe it all to you, Emak.
From the time that I was small,
You encouraged me in everything,
And tried not to let me fall.


Throughout my life your caring,
Brightened each and every minute.
You loved me and enriched my life,
And I’m so glad to have you in it!


I ♥ YOU, EMAK
I'm sorry Emak I missed your birthday, the time flew by so fast, I never realised that today is your birthday, until you called me. So let me just send greetings now, I hope it's not too late Emak, I wish you a happy blessing birthday, even though I'm late! Hope it is wonderful! And I will always LOVE you Emak....

[.Bulan Bahasa Kebangsaan.]

Alhamdulillah.  I won first place in the 'Pertandingan Menulis Cerpen Bulan Bahasa Kebangsaan'. Seriously, I never expect to win this competition. My short story entitle 'Semilir Angin Bertiup' was one of the meaningful stories that I've written. So, it's kind of appreciation for me won this competition...

[.I Love You as My Closest, Dearest Friend.]

People always say that friendships should be treasured.

But I want something more with you 'A'.

My love for you could never be measured.

I only wish you could see how I feel.

Will you even no how much I pain for you cry for you and try to smile, laugh, and shine for you?

No matter how it all turns out, I'll always be your best friend.

Thanks for being my friend 'A'.

we shared many smiles and many tears, 
we shared all our hopes and all our fears...

[.sleepy.]

i'm going to bed now. i think i've read much for my revision (i'm lying!), so i'm off to recharge for a few hours. will be back to stare you my book tomorrow night! ZzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzzzzzzz.....

[.i love you kids.]

one of the things I noted several years ago was that each of children had to be shown love....


I ♥ KIDS !!!

[.study.]

OMG! final exam is just around the corner... and until now... i haven't start anything yet! so, which one i shall start first? Language Development? no... Language Description? erk... English Studies? I dont think so... Social Studies? what do you expect? =p

[.silent treatment.]

i keep asking myself. what i've done before. 'B' giving me the silent treatment for over 18 hours and until now... 'B' still in silent mode... we have been together for almost  5 months... i still have no idea what makes 'B' behave this way... and now... no more talking, gossiping, laughing etc between us... im just absolutely shut out... it hurts me 'B'...maybe i should give 'B' some time off... i know, u have try ur best to keep our friendship last forever... i love our friendship............. 

[.do not disturb me!.]

yeah... dont disturb me people! im being fragile now... my head is fully occupied with those grammatical things, vocab, poem, play etc... bla... bla... bla... ZzZzZzZzZzZz.....

[.finally........]

finally... my last assignment (LDS) for final foundation programme will be submitted tomorrow...now is the time for last revision.... chaiyok!!!

[. let me tell you something.]

im not childish but sometimes i have too be like one... i want to love and i want to be loved... children was born as a gift from God... the same things goes to me! so, everyone please treat me well or else, you will be considered as ungrateful... be thankful because you are lucky to have people like me in this world... and im lucky to have them in my life... love each other! as much as you can! this is the secret of happiness that people tend to forget. im not insulting anybody but please appreciate people! appreciate so-called friendship! and appreciate your precious life... we cant live alone...

 

[.i really need you now.]

tepat jam 9.25 malam bersamaan 16 oktober 2010... aku dapat panggilan dari mr. abah... dah lama aku tak talk personally dengan mr. abah... which i didn't expect at all... siyes tak sangka... semalam aku call mrs. emak... citer semua benda yang terkumpul selama ini... hari tu balik tak sempat langsung... mrs. emak busy sangat2... aku pon balik kejap sangat.... the same thing goes to mr. abah... aku sempat berbual-bual gitu jelah... so, aku balik macam tak balik...

siyesly, aku rasa down gila semalam... news yang aku dapat semalam betul2 wat aku jadi miserable... tapi nak cover punya pasal... terpaksa la jadi plastik kejap... buat2 happy... walaupun dalam hati hanya Allah yang tahu... ape benda news tu? let me keep it as a secret... biarlah... tu semua pon salah aku... i should be blamed... tu aku sedar... cukup sedar... bercakap dengan mrs. emak semalam, at least jauh di sudut hati aku... aku rasa sikit lega than before... mrs. emak betul2 bagi aku semangat which i dont think i have that... dah punah segala semangat aku sebelum ni... kadang2 aku fikir... kenapa aku masuk ipba... kenapa aku sanggup tolak segala offer... bukan aku tak dapat... tapi masa tu aku dah ingat nak jadi cikgu je... nak tunaikan harapan mr. abah dan mrs. emak...

call daripada mr. abah tadi really helps me... setelah segala yang terjadi... memang itu yang aku harapakan... in fact, tu yang aku mahukan... air mata lak memang tak leh nak control... sejak akhir2 ni tak tau la kenapa... mr. hati ni midah sangat nak sensitip... macam dah tak kuat dah nak terus hidup... tapi, walau apepon jadik... family tetap ada di sisi aku... kuatkan semangat aku... bagi moral support... aku sangat appreciate... thanks mr. abah...

[.terima kasih.]

aku masih lagi mampu untuk bertatih sendiri.

tanpa kau aku masih boleh hidup

bernafas

dan berlari.

terima kasih kerana melayan aku seperti sampah yang paling hina dalam muka bumi ini.

TERIMA KASIH!

[.what do you think uh?.]

selamat malam dan salam sejahtera... aku bukan nak melaporkan berita apatah lagi untuk merapu meraban... entry kali ni aku nak memupuk keinsafan dalam kalangan para blogger... boleh? sungguh takde kena mengena...

2 hari lepas aku keluar ke amcorp mall dengan abang wan... tunaikan janji nak belanja brader tu punya birthday... tak aci langsung... minta budak kecil belanja... payah ada member cam beliau... namun hati perlu dituluskan ikhlaskan... mood hari raya yang tak pernah pudar... nak dijadikan cerita, abang wan sibuk nak pergi beli apebenda alah tu.... aku pon tak taw... singgah la guardian... dah dapat ape dia nak kite orang terus pergi level 3 cari makanan... sekali kat eskalator ni adalah  1 brader ni jalan macam kena kejar en. hanjeng... suka suki beliau langgar ibu mengandung... tak berbudi bahasa betol! monolog dalaman je la masa tu... kang sound tak pasal kena kelar... ada sanggup?

pastu masa last eskalator tuh tetiba ada auntie ni turun... kira cam berselisih lah... muka dia very innocent... kalau ada earthquake mase tu... kompem dia tak sedar... entah camne dia nak keluarkan something dari handbag beliau....

PAP!!!!

jatuh wang hengget malaysia 50! yang tak bole blahnye... she didn't notice at all... gile bapak murah hati auntie ni... dan part yang paling tragis sekali adalah brader yang tadinye jalan macam tak cukup tanah tetiba berhenti pungut duit tuh!!! what the hell r u doing bitch!!! itu dah consider mencuri! jenyayah berat dan boleh dikenakan tindakan undang2 di bawah seksyen 13 kanun keseksaan yang paling terseksa di alam semesta neh! kalah honey starz! gamapang tol brader tuh! boleh je nak pulang kan balik... bukan auntie tuh berlari pecut... berdasarkan pemerhatian aku... kelajuan auntie tuh berjalan sangat mengecewakan... acceleration dia seperti tidak berubah... adakah pergerkan auntie tu statik? mari kita tanya cikgu fizik... hanya mereka mampu mengubah teori ngarut aku neh!

pastu brader tadi perasaan aku nampak action dia... yang hanya beliau lakukan adalah tersenyum dan tersengih! kalaulah kat Malaysia ada eskalator yang boleh tekan suis turun naik dalam masa yang sama... dah lama aku turun libas guna wedges mek meeerool...

moralnya adalah: jangan mencurik! berdosalah weyh!!!

[.because we are Muslim.]

 

dedicated to all Muslims all over the world... 

[.pagi, ayam dan raya.]

sumpah pagi tadi aku dengar bunyik ayam kat belakang! aku genyeh2 mata nengok khairi ada kat dalam bilik! kompem aku kat ipba! since when ipba ada ayam? kacau tidur tol la... hantar kat ayamas kang, selamat ko en. ayam!

btw, alhamdulillah semalam aku selamat tiba di lapangan terbang antarabangsa kulaijaya (KJIA) terus dari uganda... aku masih lagi mampu untuk tersenyum riak tatkala melihat sepupu sepapat yang menjemput kat airport... berlinanganlah tangisan busuk hati dia orang di sana sini... well, aku dah pergi uganda! korang bila lagi? cepat sebelum terlambat. air asia pilihan terbaik percutian anda....

see, aku sempat bergambar lagi dengan owner air asia... comel tak aku dengan kot pink tu? sesuai kan? siap ada aweks seksi dari air asia lagi... batal puasa enam aku!

hari tu mase raya sempat la member2 aku ziarah aku kat uganda... sayu hati ni, terngiang-ngiang lagu dato siti kat telinga... biskut almond london tetiba terasa lemau dalam mulut... air sirap limau aku pun dah tak terasa masam limaunya... sedih tol aku beraya kat uganda neh... nasib baik ada kawan2... riang ria cikgu rubina raya aku...

ada lagi... tapi tetiba je line aku problem... nanti la aku tambah kemudian... aku penat lagi neh... terima kasih kepada penduduk uganda yang banyak membantu... pembentangan projek akan aku buat tak lama lagi... so sekarang aku nak rest in peace... sekian...

[.busy.]

maaf la... mak aku suruh aku pergi uganda sepanjang dua minggu ni... nengok projek ternak kambing dengan kura2... pastu bagi motivasi sikit kat kaum2 ibu kat sana sempena hari kanak2 sedunia... jadi aku akan busy dengan kajian kambing dan kura2 aku tu... jangan risau, nanti balik aku akan bawa 1 formula untuk memelihara spesies binatang yang dah hampir pupus time raya ni... aku sendiri tak berapa nak pasti keadaan dekat sana... ada wifi tak kat kandang kambing tu... kompem2 broadband digi aku takleh pakai!!! jadi doakan saya selamat hendaknya... jangan kenang daku dalam doamu... terima kasih...

dikesempatan ni aku menundukkan diri mengucapkan selamat hari raya... maaf zahir dan batin... semoga syawal ini membawa 1001 sinar kebahagiaan dan ketakwaan... INSYAALLAH...

[.rejected.]

aku pernah menganggap pengorbanan aku tak dipandang... kadangkala benda2 macam ni boleh menyebabkan aku lupa nak pakai sabun masa nak mandi... ataupun terlupa nak lap mulut lepas makan kat garden... dan pernah terlintas dalam benakku untuk pergi dari muka bumi ni selama-lamanya bila aku lupa bawa syiling pergi basuh baju kat eltc... time tulah baru aku nak bermuhasabah diri... apekah dosaku!!! sesungguhnya... Tuhan memang nak menguji aku...

malam tu port kasi baik... balik terawikh aku terus buat muka bersungguh-sungguh nak buat homework... segala kerja aku letak depan bijik mata dengan harapan aku tak lupa... letak la coklat sebar depan aku... kompem aku tak pandang (aku memang menipu!)... semata-mata nak siapkan homework punya pasal... laptop pon aku tak on... nak fokus konon-kononyer... cam haram... pen? ada! pensel? ada! highlight? ada! pemadam? ada lagi suku! ok... mase untuk bergempur dengan en. malas!!! go..go chaiyok jaaz! u can do it! kata pari2 suci dalam otak aku... fokus! fokus! fokus! first, kerja LDV! buat GO = Gegar Otak Graphic Organiser... semangat tahap dewa aku....

design kasi baik aku buat...

sikit punya tekun aku buat kerja... betul tak? (sila abaikan meja yang serabut tu!)

see, punyalah aku berdedikasi dalam menjalankan tanggungjawab sebagai seorang guru pelatih... fokus gila buat kerja! lebih kurang 1 jam gak aku nak siapkan GO ni... yek ar... nak bace, pastu cari main point lagi... bukan senang punya kerja... dahlah teks panjang tahap batu bersurat zaman paleolitik... ikutkan hati nak je kasi Mak Jah buat bungkus nasi lemak.... dah siap, hati aku jadi senang... berbunga-bunga jiwa aku time tu... suka punya pasal... aku masukkan kerja dalam fail... get ready nak tidur... esok nak bangun sahur... plan nak tolong bonda... aku tidur sambil tersenyum... penuh keimanan...

esoknya, aku pergi kelas dengan penuh semangat... langkahku tak seperti biasa... siap nyanyi lagu 'ayuh kembali ke sekolah' lagi... bersiul-siul manja... kelas LS habis macam biasa... penuh kebosanan (apa yang aku tak bosan?)... kelas LDV aku masuk lambat sikit, pergi gents dulu... hajat tak sabor2 sangat nak keluar... nak wat camne... hajat didahulukan kepuasan diutamakan... baekkk! masuk kelas, lecturer dok bincang paper semalam... hurm... dia tak tanya pasal GO semalam kew... pas abis kelas kot... aku cuba sedapkan hati... ye! memang dia ada tanya pasal GO, tapi bukan siap ke tak... ikut procedure ke tak..

huh??? time tu gak aku dapat rasakan red blood cell aku tak dapat di transferkan dengan baik... dunia cam gelap je! (bukan earth hour ye!)... sekali lagi pituitary gland aku gagal berfungsi.... apekah??? oh tidak..... camne la benda boleh terjadi??? nape tak bagitahu awal2... kompem kes nasi dah jadi bubur... luluh hatiku.... KERJA AKU KENA REJECT! dalam hatiku terus beristighfar... minta dijauhkan daripada sebarang kes pembunuhan atau simbah asid dibulan puasa...

ikutkan hati... aku bukan jenis kisah sangat... nak berjaya kena la work smart! tapi masalah aku lebih kepada en.malas dalam badan neh... ish bila la kau nak rajin wahai jaazli... aku nak pi redo aku punya GO... cari semangat balik! pastu, aku nak pi study SS pulak... nak kena prepare untuk next presentation... kalu tak nak kena soal cam orang baru pas ragut mak cik2 nak pergi pasar... baik pi study...

mood: semangat yang tak pernah pudar (tipu gila!)